I recently did a webinar on the psychological aspects of negotiation from both a personal and business perspective. The response was so positive that it seemed a good idea to include a few highlights in the current podcast episode.
Mention negotiation and people instantly think uncomfortable situations and setting your jaw to not give an inch, when it really does not have to be that way. It is possible to do things that can help your side while also creating a positive mindset for the other side without manipulation or even jaw setting. The following are a few minor changes in how to approach negotiation that can make it a lot more enjoyable.
Display confidence in setting a time to meet
Have you ever tried to set a time for a meeting and had the other person say “I’m free almost anytime. Let me know what works for you.” This happens a lot and actually puts you in a weakened position in the eyes of the person with whom you are negotiating. I’m sure if you asked the person saying it they would respond that they were simply trying to keep things simple to set the meeting. However, the subtle psychological signal they are sending is they are not busy even if you are. For the person on the receiving end, rather than being seen as helpful, it puts all the weight on them to come up with a time. Without meaning to you have already created a weak image. Better to throw out some times and ask “How does that work for you?” Even though negotiations have not begun, each side is sizing the other up in terms of how much position each has.
Weather plays a major unconscious role in any negotiation
Very few people recognize the effect weather has on their day to day activities such as several studies indicating an increase in domestic violence as temperatures rise (Cunningham, 1979; LeBeau 2012). Many people do not recognize they feel less positive about life on rainy or overcast days. Basically, bad weather correlates with bad outcomes. However, researchers have found that these negative effects were decreased or eliminated when a short conversation was held about the weather. It’s a simple mindset shift that occurs when you bring attention to the conditions because it allows the person to become aware of their thinking and make adjustments.
Want to make an impression? Be first or last
We humans are unconsciously affected by what’s called the primacy and the recency effect, meaning our brains give greater weight to things at the beginning or end of a series of events (Munlock 1962). Have a job interview or you’re one of a series of vendors competing for a contract? Try to be as close as possible to the beginning or end of the list. Just make sure you’ve come prepared to dazzle them.
The medium really is the message
Another research finding that might surprise you is that there is a gender aspect to the platform you use during negotiations. It indicates that female negotiators receive better deals when they negotiate face-to-face. Men, on the other hand, do better using email or the phone. Gender becomes a factor because when stressed we tend to revert to stereotypical communication styles (not in all cases, but a high number); meaning females become caring and communicative and males become aggressive and dominate (Swab & Swab).
The same holds in negotiating with one gender versus another. If you are a male trying to negotiate with another male, if possible try using email or the phone, but if you must do face-to-face attempt to keep body language signals to a minimum and mirror their body language to develop more rapport while decreasing eye contact. For females, the opposite applies in that you want to increase body language signals such as appearing open and receptive (but not seductive) while increasing eye contact which enhances rapport. If a female is not able to negotiate with another female in person, attempt to keep email or phone conversations as folksy as possible yet professional to help develop the rapport that would be present face-to-face.
There are many more psychological signals to consider, but I hope these help to get you started in thinking about them. Happy negotiating!!
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